远。
Monday, October 19, 2015; 12:46 AM |
People drift apart.
Family, friends, best friends, colleagues, classmates.
You spend less time together, talk less, listen less, think of each other less. And when someone asks you if you've been in contact with he/she, you'd say "no, we've both been busy." The thing about drifting apart from someone, I realised, is that it's usually something we ourselves allow to happen, though we'd always have plenty of reasons to point fingers at (change of school, differnt life stages, busy schedules). So similarly, not drifting apart from someone, is one that requires a conscious effort.
It's sad to admit, but there really are many people in my life I've allowed to "drift apart" from me or me from them. But then again I don't want to put all the blame upon myself saying I'm the reason we're no longer as close as we used to be. Because that someone probably did choose to allow it to happen as well.
When both sides of a relationship decides "well yea, drifting apart is okay", does it mean there's no longer any meaning to hold out or hold on to the relationship? What if it's one that dates back a long way? What if that person was a part of a big part of your life? What if that relationship has helped mould you into the person you are today?
I don't really know how to put this across in words, but it's a feeling you get when you realise that the other person in the relationship also feels that drifting apart is 'okay'. It's a little sour, a little hurtful, a little heartbreaking all at the same time. And if you ask me why I'd feel that way, I don't really have an answer to that. And yes I have a friend I was once very close to, though I don't really know why, how and when, we drifted apart, slowly but surely. It's always something we regret in our greeting cards to each other, like how we have not been meeting up enough, catching up on each other's life enough, or at all. But maybe not up till recent, I've always thought, well yes, our schedules are different, it's hard to find time to meet, we're in diff life stages, so it's natural we'd drift apart. Never really faced the fact that though it's hard to find time to meet, it has always been up to us to make time to meet, and the reason why we've drifted is cause we both didn't feel the need to make time for each other. This status of "best friend" has kept us as friends, and I'm sad that at times we're placed in situations that forces us to assume the status even though we really aren't quite it. Actually, I'm just sad that you had to see me, on such an important day for you, as your best friend when I haven't played that part all these years to you.
Unable to round the post up in a proper manner, just, once again, filled with thoughts about why things have changed, if I'm okay with all of it, if my realization would change anything, and if my realization doesn't change anything, what does that make me? )':
远。
Monday, October 19, 2015; 12:46 AM |
People drift apart.
Family, friends, best friends, colleagues, classmates.
You spend less time together, talk less, listen less, think of each other less. And when someone asks you if you've been in contact with he/she, you'd say "no, we've both been busy." The thing about drifting apart from someone, I realised, is that it's usually something we ourselves allow to happen, though we'd always have plenty of reasons to point fingers at (change of school, differnt life stages, busy schedules). So similarly, not drifting apart from someone, is one that requires a conscious effort.
It's sad to admit, but there really are many people in my life I've allowed to "drift apart" from me or me from them. But then again I don't want to put all the blame upon myself saying I'm the reason we're no longer as close as we used to be. Because that someone probably did choose to allow it to happen as well.
When both sides of a relationship decides "well yea, drifting apart is okay", does it mean there's no longer any meaning to hold out or hold on to the relationship? What if it's one that dates back a long way? What if that person was a part of a big part of your life? What if that relationship has helped mould you into the person you are today?
I don't really know how to put this across in words, but it's a feeling you get when you realise that the other person in the relationship also feels that drifting apart is 'okay'. It's a little sour, a little hurtful, a little heartbreaking all at the same time. And if you ask me why I'd feel that way, I don't really have an answer to that. And yes I have a friend I was once very close to, though I don't really know why, how and when, we drifted apart, slowly but surely. It's always something we regret in our greeting cards to each other, like how we have not been meeting up enough, catching up on each other's life enough, or at all. But maybe not up till recent, I've always thought, well yes, our schedules are different, it's hard to find time to meet, we're in diff life stages, so it's natural we'd drift apart. Never really faced the fact that though it's hard to find time to meet, it has always been up to us to make time to meet, and the reason why we've drifted is cause we both didn't feel the need to make time for each other. This status of "best friend" has kept us as friends, and I'm sad that at times we're placed in situations that forces us to assume the status even though we really aren't quite it. Actually, I'm just sad that you had to see me, on such an important day for you, as your best friend when I haven't played that part all these years to you.
Unable to round the post up in a proper manner, just, once again, filled with thoughts about why things have changed, if I'm okay with all of it, if my realization would change anything, and if my realization doesn't change anything, what does that make me? )':
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